


don't you ever tame your demons

by Nucci



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Angst, Dysfunctional Family, Gen, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Post-Canon, Time Travel, all the Klaus warnings, there's just a lot going on, they try to be a good family
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-30
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:22:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26184886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nucci/pseuds/Nucci
Summary: Starts at the end of Season 2.The siblings are confronted by The Sparrow Academy and try to come to terms with how their venture to the 1960s altered the timeline.As the siblings band together to correct the timeline, they don’t notice Klaus beginning to spiral.
Comments: 12
Kudos: 82





	1. just a little rush babe

**Author's Note:**

> This story is inspired by this Tumblr post featuring Robert Sheehan's take on Klaus' character in the third season: https://maundering-marauder.tumblr.com/post/627791923716947968
> 
> The story title is a lyric from Hozier's 'Arsonist's Lullabye,' which is deffo a Klaus song.
> 
> Unlike other stories I've posted, I actually know where this one is going. My goal is to update weekly. 
> 
> Not beta-read.
> 
> Enjoy!

“Shit,” the siblings say together, looking at a Ben-lookalike in front of them and a resurrected Hargreeves behind them. 

“Yea, no, nope,” Luther says, looking out at his siblings, too many emotions flitting across their faces “we’re not doing this again.”

Luther turns and faces Five, “We need to jump again.”

Five barely glances at him, eyes focused on Ben. 

“Five!” Luther yells, visibly startling Five, who glances his way. He catches Allison and Diego shaking themselves out of whatever reverie had settled in upon seeing Ben. 

“We’re not doing this again,” Luther continues, pointing at Hargreeves, “Something went wrong. We can’t stay here, we need to jump.”

“We’ll, eh,” Five clears his throat, glancing at Ben one more time, “We’ll need to give the device some time to reboot before we can use it again. I’ll, uh, I’ll need to run some calculations, but yes… Yes, we should be able to jump again soon.”

“Okay, great, great,” Luther says, looking at his siblings, most of them seem to have shaken out of their shock. His eyes land on Klaus, who doesn’t seem to be moving, jumps over to Vanya, who’s inched her way closer to Allison, then skitters back to Klaus. Klaus who doesn’t seem to be moving let alone breathing. Luther’s eyes stay on Klaus, checking him over for anything he’s missed. 

At the same time that Luther realizes Klaus just doesn’t look like he’s not breathing he’s plain not, a high-pitched wheeze comes out of Klaus. 

“Diego,” Luther yells at his brother closest to Klaus, “he’s not breathing!”

“Shit,” Diego curses and rushes over, “Bro, bro -- look at me, what’s up? You need to breathe man, breathe.” 

Klaus crumbles as Diego settles a hand on his shoulder. A high keening noise makes its way out of Klaus’ throat, his eyes never leaving the vision of Ben in front of them. Klaus crumbles into an unsteady squat, hands pulling at his hair and rocking back and forth. 

“Klaus, bro, look at me,” Diego pleads, settling into a squat next to Klaus and putting his hands on each side of Klaus’ face, glancing at Ben quickly, who’s glaring at them, then back down to Klaus, “Come on man, breathe. You’re scaring us here” 

“What is going on,” Reginald demands, cane striking the ground, “Is the hippie having another episode? Calm him down immediately.”

Diego, who’s busy trying to coax Klaus out of whatever's going on, shoots a glare at Reginald. 

“Dad, what is going on?” the Ben look-alike demands again, grimacing at the scene before him. 

“He’s not having an episode, he’s having a panic attack,” Vanya yells at Reginald, ignoring Ben, then looks at Allison hesitantly, “Did he… does he… get them often?” 

“I, um, I’m not sure. I haven’t seen him in years before Dallas. I mean, he used to get them as kids, but god… I haven’t seen him have one since before Five disappeared,” Allison explains, hugging her arms to her middle. 

“Diego,” Vanya says, making her way over to her brothers, “have him mimic your breathing.”

“Wh-what?” Diego stammers, not fully hearing Vanya, concern written on his face as he gently manhandles Klaus’ face up to him. Klaus’ lips are starting to pale and his eyes are glossy. 

“Here, let me,” Vanya says, gently pushing Diego out of the way. 

“Hey Klaus, hey,” Vanya says as she lowers herself to Klaus’ level, his face is pale and eyes pleading, “Hey, it’s alright. Just breathe ok.”

Vanya gently unclenches one of his hands curled up in his hair and places it high up on her chest. 

“Follow my lead, okay. Breathe in with me,” she says and over acts breathing in and out slowly. 

“Klaus, you’re in the Academy with us, okay?” Vanya says gently, “Can you focus on your breathing for me?” 

Klaus takes in a stuttering breath, Vanya smiles “That’s it, good job.”

“Okay, Klaus -- can you describe where you are for me?” Vanya asks, hoping to ground him. His eyes skitter over to Ben, then his surroundings, jumping from point to point. His breathing picks up. 

“Okay, okay… no worries. How about, can you describe what I’m wearing?” His eyes meet hers, raggedly breathing in and out as he begins slowly describing her clothing. 

“B-b-boring button up,” he gasps, the sounds of his ragged breathing the only other sound in the room, “and j-jeans. My tiny pocket lesbian.” He laughs, then wheezes as his breath catches. 

“Okay, cool it with the jokes and focus on breathing man,” Diego says from Vanya’s side, glancing down at Klaus. 

“Great, great -- okay, just do what Diego said and focus on breathing for now, okay?” Vanya asks, a smile pulling at her lips, as she helps Klaus up. They stand up, and she realizes she’s facing Ben. He looks so similar to the Ben that was in her mind, yet so very different. She hears Klaus’ breathing catch again. She glances up to his face and sees he’s staring straight at Ben, unwavering this time. Klaus leans into Vanya, and breathes. 

“Dad--” look-alike Ben begins again, but is cut off by Hargreeves hitting his cane on the floor. 

“Enough Number One, I heard you the first time,” Hargreeves snaps. 

Luther’s head snaps over to Reginald, eyes wide, then looks over at Diego who shrugs and mouths ‘Number One’.

“Children,” Reginald begins, glancing at the siblings in front of him, before angling his face up to the figures on the landing above, “meet who you could have become.”


	2. to derail the mind

For a moment there is silence. 

Klaus glances at Not Ben from where he’s leaning into Vanya. Not Ben looks puzzled and frustrated. Klaus knows. It’s the same face he was met with countless times. He has to look away. It hurts. Seeing this Ben and it not being his Ben, his brother. It hurts more than he thinks he can bear. 

“Sparrow Academy,” Reginald begins, looking up and addressing the figures on the landing. Klaus can’t look at him. It was hard enough at their dinner a couple days ago. But that Reginald looked different, younger. He could differentiate Young Reginald with Sir Reginald. This Reginald… the commanding tone in his voice, the frustration… this is Sir Reginald and it brings back too many memories. 

The punches keep rolling in and it’s hard to just let it all roll off his back. 

Reginald continues, addressing the group above Klaus and the others, “These ill-mannered malcontents shall be staying with us in the East Wing quarters for the time being. Do not interact unless necessary. You are dismissed.”

Upon being dismissed, the figures in the landing above slowly leave. Klaus still couldn’t get a good view of them, but he counted five and some floating box. Klaus figured he was dealing with enough as is and tried to not think too much on it. 

“Number One, stay and stand at ease,” Reginald addressed Not Ben behind them, “You may be needed.” 

Not Ben nodded and dropped into a position Klaus remembered well from his time in Vietnam. Not Ben’s hands were clasped behind his back, his chin still at attention, eyes front, expression blank. 

It made him think of Dave. 

Klaus felt a shiver down his spine and shuddered. Vanya tilted her face up to Klaus, a questioning look in her eyes. Klaus caught her eye and plastered on a smile, shaking his head. The smile felt tight and brittle, he knew it didn’t quite reach his eyes, but it was enough to soothe whatever worries Vanya had. 

“Now, for you. Miscreants out of time,” Reginald began, his voice booming and startling Klaus out of whatever rabbit hole his mind was trying to spiral into. 

“I’ve been expecting you to show up again,” Reginald said, addressing Five. Five’s face was tight as he nodded at Reginald, some weird look passing between the two of them. 

Reginald shifted to address Diego, “It appears you are once again zero for two.” Diego sucked in a breath. Klaus imagined Diego was thinking the same thing. This felt oddly similar to the dressdown they received mere days ago with a younger Sir Reginald.

“No war. No apocalypse,” Reginald continued, addressing Luther. 

“Though, I don’t think I fully appreciated our supper until years later when news came that children had been born to women that were not pregnant that morning. You appeared to have left out that detail,” Reginald was now addressing Allison. 

“I decided to follow fate and collect seven of those children from across the globe,” Reginald explained, now facing Klaus and Vanya, and nodding back at Not Ben. 

“At first, I thought I would shrug off the hands of fate and collect seven other children. Supposedly more than forty were born into existence that fateful day in October. But curiosity gained the better of me. I decided to collect children that I expected to showcase abilities not unlike your own,” Reginald continued, continuing to look at Klaus and Vanya. 

“I collected them, brought them here,” Reginald gestured to the Academy, “and trained them to, as you put it ‘fight against the end of the world.’”

“But…,” Allison started, “You said this wasn’t the Umbrella Academy?”

“Correct you are,” Reginald confirmed, “This is the Sparrow Academy. After our conversation all those years ago, I vowed that if I ever did adopt children, which I still found an unlikely outcome, I would not coddle them as your father coddled you. I would teach them, train them, and shape them into a unit that could actually save the world. I vowed to --”

“But, you did that to us,” Luther interrupted, “You adopted us and created The Umbrella Academy.”

Reginald ignored him and continued. 

“I vowed to train out any insolence,” he pointedly looked at Luther, “any illusions of grandeur,” he moved on to Diego, “any proclivities to addiction,” then Klaus, “or fears of using your abilities to the fullest,” he moved on to Allison. 

“I vowed to correct my mistakes. Your father foolishly brought you up as a family, instilled the notion that you could do as you please. He wasted your potential. I rectified it.”

And for the second time that day, there was only silence. 

Then chaos. 

“I was never insolent! I never even spoke back to you. I let you… I let you --,” Luther yelled , spluttering, seemingly at a loss of words. 

“F- F- Fuck you,” Diego spat, “You were a monster to us. You didn’t coddle us. Fuck you and fuck the Sparrow Academy.”

Diego spun on his heel, “Team Zero, we’re out.”

“I’m afraid that’s not happening,” Reginald replied calmly, “As I said, you’ll be staying here.” 

“Yea, well, I don’t think that’s happening old man,” Diego spun back around, grabbing a knife from behind his back and pointing it at Reginald. 

“You made it perfectly clear that this isn’t our home,” Allison’s voice cut through the chaos. 

“You have your Sparrow Academy, you don’t need us. We’d like to leave,” she continued, her head held high as she met Reginald’s gaze. 

“My dear girl, and where will you go?” Reginald asked, sickeningly sweet. 

“Trust me, we’ll figure it out,” Allison replied back, her tone matching his. 

“Well, as I said, I’m afraid that just won’t be happening,” Reginald continued calmly, eyeing Diego whose body was tense and ready to strike, “You’ll be staying here. End of discussion. Dinner will be served promptly at 7. Training will begin tomorrow. You are dismissed.”

Klaus had been silent during the exchange. His mind still processing Not Ben and a newly alive Sir Reginald. It was… well, it was a lot. But, fuck him if he didn’t just hear a phrase he thought he had left in the dust. 

He really didn’t mind staying at the Bird Academy or whatever Reggie’s calling it now, but he will not, under any circumstances, be training. He straightened a bit, took a step away from Vanya and geared up. 

“Err… hi there pops, wish we could stay, but I think you said training and that’s a solid no from me. So, yea, we’ll just be going,” Klaus said, flopping his hands around and pointing toward the entrance way and taking a step in that direction. 

Klaus felt a tentacle slowly wrap it’s way around his wrist. 

And… he… froze. 

His brain short-circuited for a moment. 

He looked over at Not Ben. 

He was still standing at ease. Eyes still vacant. But tentacles had started slithering out from under his shirt. One of them finding its way across Klaus’ wrist. 

Yea no. 

He laughed shrilly. 

“Aww, how sweet. Thanks for the offer, but I can actually find my way out of here all by lonesome. No need to help,” Klaus quipped, plastering on a smile and trying to calm his pounding heart. 

“Father said you’ll be staying with us. You won’t be leaving,” Not Ben said, eyes now locked on to his. 

“Ah well, thing is, he’s not my dad,” Klaus laughed trying to calm his heart, eyes glancing at his siblings. They were frozen glancing back and forth between Klaus and Not Ben. He gulped past the lump in his throat, cleared his throat, and laughed again, trying not to focus on Not Ben, “Soooooo… I think I actually will be leaving.”

Not Ben tightened his tentacle’s grip on Klaus’ wrist. Klaus winced, he could hear his bones creak in his wrist, he let out a small whimper. 

“Be… Stop! Get your hands off of him!” Vanya yelled, stumbling over Not Ben’s name, “Can’t you see you’re hurting him!” 

Not Ben ignored her. Continuing to tighten his grip on Klaus’ wrist. 

“Oww, that stings a bit buckaroo. Wouldn’t mind laying off a bit would you?” Klaus asked, his voice high and strained as he tried to pry the tentacle off his wrist. Klaus knew from experience that he wouldn’t be able to get the tentacle off until Not Ben wanted it off. He knew it was useless to try. But, try telling that to his monkey brain that was beginning to panic. 

“Hey, get off him!” Diego yelled, throwing a knife at Not Ben. 

“No!” Five yelled and jumped from his spot, reappearing in front of Not Ben and the knife. 

“Five, what the hell?!” Diego yelled and flicked his hand curving the knife’s trajectory and embedding it in the wood railing behind them. Five seemed just as confused by his actions as Diego. 

“Diego… it’s… it’s,” Five started and actually… seemed at a loss of words for once... “I didn’t think. Diego, it’s Ben. You can’t.”

“Five, he’s hurting Klaus. That’s not Ben!” Diego exploded, arms thrown wide and motioning at Klaus who was curled over his wrist, breathing sharply and desperately clawing at the tentacle that was beginning to tighten further. 

Five looked at Klaus and winced, “I know… ” he began and was cut off by a loud crack and a sharp inhale from Klaus. 

“Fuuuuuuuck,” Klaus moaned quietly, rocking back and forth on his heels, curling tighter over his wrist. His other hand clawing into the tentacle. 

“That’s enough Number One,” Reginald broke the ensuing chaos.

Not Ben glanced at Reginald, tightened his tentacle once more causing Klaus to whine, and let go. 

Klaus breathed in through his nose and let out a shuddering breath, whimpering quietly. He felt a touch on his shoulder and jumped spinning around, his eyes wide and frantic, hiding his wrist behind him. Unshed tears making the green of his eyes glisten as he searched Vanya’s face. 

“Hey, hey, it’s just me,” Vanya said, her hands held up in a universal gesture of goodwill. Klaus blinked and shuddered, a tear tracing down his face. He quickly brought up his shoulder to wipe his face and hissed in pain. 

“Yea, how about let’s not do that,” Vanya joked. She wedged herself next to him and let him slump on her a bit, rubbing his back to ease the pain and looking past him to Ben, her eyes gleaming silver as the floor began to vibrate. 

“That is quite enough,” Reginald commanded, striking the floor with his cane and startling Vanya out of her focus, “If you won’t stay willingly as guests, then you will be forced to stay.” 

“Number One, gather Numbers Two and Five. We’ll need their help escorting our guests,” Reginald ordered, voice strained and thin, frustration seeping into his words. 

“Yes Sir,” Not Ben nodded, clicked his heels, and turned, heading up the stairs. 

Klaus watched Not Ben retreat warily. His gait was the same as Ben’s he noted. 

Reginald struck the floor with his cane again, catching Klaus and his siblings’ attention. 

“While you are staying here, you will refrain from any further insolence. You have seen what will happen if you do not follow direct commands,” Reginald gestured to Klaus. 

Klaus could see Diego bristling at Reginald’s comment and knew he was ready to snap back at their Not Father. He braced himself for the ensuing fight. 

Allison laid a hand on Diego’s arm to calm him, he shook her off and glared at her. Allison leaned in and whispered something to him that… well, Klaus wouldn’t say whatever Allison said calmed Diego down, but at least he wasn’t about to get into another fight. Klaus continued watching, leaning into Vanya. 

“I heard a rumor,” Allison began, taking a breath. Her voice echoing. 

“--that you couldn’t speak,” Allison finished. 

Except. 

Klaus frowned. 

Allison’s voice started out in front of him and finished behind him. Klaus glanced at Vanya and they swapped confused looks. Okay, cool so it wasn’t just his ears playing tricks on him. Good to know. 

“Well done, Number Five,” Reginald commented. 

Okay… Klaus was really confused now. And in pain. Today had been… a lot. 

Klaus caught Vanya’s eyes again, she shrugged in confusion. Yea, he agreed. Five hadn’t done anything, so weird. He glanced at Five who looked equally perplexed. 

Klaus looked at Allison again to try and figure out who she rumored to not talk and why… of all the things she could have commanded... she picked that. 

Except, when he looked at Allison, she looked panicked. 

“Allison?” Luther asked, turning to her. 

Allison’s head snapped around to look at Luther. Eyes wild in panic. Her hands grasping at her throat, mouth opening and closing without any sound, oddly reminiscent of when her throat was slashed. 

“Allison, what’s going on?” Luther asked again, edging toward her. 

“Cat got your tongue?” Allison’s voice echoed behind Klaus again. 

Klaus whipped around, hissing in pain as the movement jarred his broken wrist. 

Vanya gasped. 

“What the hell…” Diego breathed looking up at the stairs. 

Klaus wasn’t… He couldn’t… His mind was floundering. 

Klaus blinked and looked back at Allison. Her focus was on the stairs as well. Her eyes still wild in panic and confusion. 

Klaus looked back at the stairs and breathed, “Shit.” 

Because… it wasn’t just Not Ben on the stairs. 

Allison… or.. fuck... Not Allison was on the stairs with Not Ben. Klaus’ head hurt. And they weren’t alone. Some fucking cube was floating next to them. 

Not Allison laughed. Her laugh all fake and breathy and mocking. 

“I couldn’t let you rumor dad, now could I?” Not Allison mocked. Because. Shit… it was Allison. Her hair was a little different, and she held herself like she did before the apocalypse when they were all gathered at Dad’s funeral. All high and mighty. But, she was wearing the same uniform as Not Ben. 

All of a sudden, this Reginald’s explanation of Sparrow Academy and how he ‘vowed for them to be different’ began to make more sense. 

“Fuck,” Five breathed, “You still adopted us?” he asked, turning around from the stairs to look at Reginald. 

Reginald gave a quick nod in response. 

“Fuuuuuuck,” Diego echoed. 

“Umm,” Klaus started. Because yea, his wrist hurt like a bitch, but the downright madness of the situation kinda gave him blinders to the pain, “If you adopted all of us. Then who’s the floaty box thing?” 

Reginald smirked. “Number Two,” he ordered, “Show these guests,” he emphasized the word, “to their quarters.”

“Cool cool cool,” Klaus muttered, “That was, like, super helpful.”

Klaus looked back at the cube. Klaus bet it was Luther, figures he’d end up a cube. Maybe that’s how Reggie ‘healed’ him if this universe’s Luther also had that mission completely backfire.

The cube started shaking. Klaus eyed it more warily. Death by cube was not the way Klaus thought he would go. 

And then the cube… just vanished. Well, more like it… disintegrated? 

And in its place was… 

“WHAT?!” Klaus screamed. 

Because he was staring at himself… Or some version of himself. He was pale. Paler than he ever had been. And was… floating. Fuck, yea. This version of himself was floating over the stairs. His feet were definitely not touching the ground. 

“What?” shouted Vanya, looking around, “Where’d it go?”

“It’s right there --- I’m right there… It’s…. I’m… On the stairs… it’s floating!” Klaus yelled back incoherently, panic creeping into his voice, breath speeding up. 

“Yea…” Vanya said hesitatingly, panic edging out of her voice, looking at Klaus in confusion, “It was floating on the stairs and then it just disappeared.”

“Fuck, no. It’s right me. I mean… it’s right there. It’s me. I’m right there,” Klaus spluttered, breath coming in faster and faster. He let go of Vanya and gestured wildly at the stairs. 

“What?” Diego snapped, looking at Klaus, “Bro, it just disappeared.”

“No, it’s right there,” Klaus snapped back, “It’s me!”

“How long until they figure it out,” Not Him asked, giggling. His voice sounded odd. High and loose. 

“Two, cut it out,” Not Ben demanded. 

‘Two’ Diego mouthed looking at Luther, who shrugged in confusion. 

“No fun,” Not Him said, giggling, but nodded and did a mock salute in Ben’s direction, crossing his legs criss-cross style still floating. “Oh captain, my captain.”

Klaus laughed breathlessly. High and tight. He wrapped his arms around his stomach and doubled over a bit in his laughter. Forgetting about his broken wrist and not caring about any pain. 

“Klaus, Bro, get it together,” Diego said, scowling in his direction. Klaus continued laughing, getting a little louder and panicky. So much for Diego being concerned for him. His laughter slowly edged into hyperventilating. 

“Klaus,” Vanya started, reaching out to him but not touching him, remembering how he reacted before. 

“Just ignore him,” Luther muttered, rolling his eyes, “It’s the drugs.” Klaus flinched at that… that… that stung. 

And then, the subject of his laughter flashed in front of him, lit up blue. Still hovering above the ground. 

“Oh… well, shit.” Five said. 

Klaus continued laughing. 

“Oh…” Diego breathed in comprehension. 

“I’m a ghostie!” Klaus laughed. And the world was black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're just gonna throw out the paradox psychosis bit of canon.


End file.
